Priest - god help us.

If you manage to stay awake past the first half of the movie, you are a saint. The lines felt so rehearsed and scripted, they were delivered as awkwardly as the opening scenes of CSI: Miami at times. There was one line to garner applause I can relate to, "If you are not committing any sin, you are not having any fun." as told by a vampire with bad teeth.

The opening was done without too much CGI and it was solid human acting. YES! But the boys then go off to fight Nosferatu and they look (and act) like Ponch and John riding around on their motorcycles. Their fight scenes were so brief and under-developed they almost appeared void of much value.

The motorcycle riding, train scenes, music, and overall production seemed geared towards those with an interest in the comic series. The film isn't scary or entertaining. It is wreaks of disappointment similar to films like Skyline, Waterworld, and Legion. A suggestion would be to stay home, watch the trailer a few times, and call it good. Borrow your buddies Redbox rental in a month and be over it. Priest will pull 2 out of 5 Cyclones for having the decency to be less than an hour and a half long, and for the good looking cast to fill the main roles.

-Jeremy Brickner
CycloneMovies.com