Watching Taylor Lautner made me ‘happy’ in some regards, but
watching this movie made me depressed, because it was not good, at all.
With the high hopes for this young man to do something
besides play Shark Boy, oh and a werewolf on Twilight, I was not convinced he
can do it after watching “Abduction”.
The tacky lines and a Mark Hamil / Hayden Christensen level of acting,
the movie left repulsive short-term memories in my mind. His stunt(ed) action scenes were
ridiculous. There were typically 2-3
camera cuts in each sequence to distract from what could have been done quite
easily with a trained stunt double. Of
course TL had his shirt off as much as possible, except when it whould have
realistically been removed, like in the water.
Lautner’s female sidekicks were equally as disappointing. Sigourney Weaver and Lily Collins were almost
as pathetic as Kristen Stewart is in Twilight. The memorable lines had so much sexual
innuendo and delivery, I almost threw up a little. The purely unemotional and scripted lines
such as “Come in the back door…” and “Knock twice before coming inside…” were
all delivered at awkward moments, without rhyme or reason.
Yes it has a Twilight feel to it. It is comparable to story as the Bourne series, and other spy vs. spy
movies. But it is not nearly as
enjoyable. Abduction will pull 2 out of
5 Cyclones merely for having eye candy
and providing tweens with a perfect movie to enjoy. The rest of us can just drop them off and see
something else.
-New CycloneMovies.com Critic-
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